The scenario
The person
"JJ" or at least that's one of her friends called her (who coincidentally were about 15 to 16 years old) JJ was the oldest in the bunch. I also should note while her other "friends" carried large book bags, JJ only carried her fake designer purse.
It's 7am in the morning and JJ gets on the bus with her friends excited about her birthday coming up.
"We can go to the strip club," JJ suggested.
"I'm only 16," one friend responded.
Another friend states disappointingly, "I'm 15 and I know they won't let me in."
"I got a cousin at the door. They'll let us in. I went last weekend and it was off the chain."
The two other friends are looking in amazement and awe as JJ gyrated her body and smiled wickedly. "Man, my cuz, had about three bottles at the table and we wuz screaming and shouting. Men wuz dancing around. Gurl, it was off da'chain."
(Amazingly for me I'm not paraphrasing although I'm omitting some of the details because they begin with the f-word and s-word.)
"You still seeing that old man?" the 16 asked.
"Shut up!" JJ said.
The 15 year old giggled. "What old man?"
16 year old said, "Some old dude comes up to us at the store and JJ gives him her number."
"He was ONLY 30." JJ said defensively. "Shut up! I'm 19 and I can see whoever I wanna see." SHE WAS BRAGGING.
"But gurl!" the 15 year old said. "You barely in the eleventh grade."
"Shut up."
The 15 year old cackles (while applying her fifth coat of lip gloss on her lips). "Was that the day you got that liquor?"
"Yeah! He cashed us out and bought us some liquor if I bought his some stuff on my bridge card," JJ confirmed.
At this point I'm appalled and fascinated... so is my ten year old as well.
"So what happened with the dude?" the 16 yr old asked.
JJ smiled wickedly again. "Gurl, he got it on..."
Needless to say, JJ started to get graphic at that point and when she started talking in detail about what she started doing to the "dude," I cleared my throat - very loudly, but JJ continued to talk, so I said, "Excuse me, but you do know everyone including my ten year old daughter can hear your conversation."
JJ actually looked offended I had the audacity to interrupt her.
"Yeah," the male bus driver said disgusted. "I hear that and you say another word I'm going to kick you off."
The 16 and 15 year old giggled, while JJ sulked the rest of the trip.
So I repeat the subject line:
You ARE 19 in the 11th grade. What's so great about bragging about that to younger friends
I wanted to say this all to her and when we got off the bus, knowing my daughter wanted to address the matter, I just said, "I hope I never stop loving you so you won't turn out that way. Nothing about that scenario wasn't right and somehow she made some serious wrong choices."
Now you ask, why did I put the blame on mothering?
Because ...
I'm proud the ten year old saw what was wrong with this woman.
I got off the bus feeling really disgusted and disgruntled, but hope for the future that I can make better women in this world.
A public bus early in the morning
The person
"JJ" or at least that's one of her friends called her (who coincidentally were about 15 to 16 years old) JJ was the oldest in the bunch. I also should note while her other "friends" carried large book bags, JJ only carried her fake designer purse.
It's 7am in the morning and JJ gets on the bus with her friends excited about her birthday coming up.
"We can go to the strip club," JJ suggested.
"I'm only 16," one friend responded.
Another friend states disappointingly, "I'm 15 and I know they won't let me in."
"I got a cousin at the door. They'll let us in. I went last weekend and it was off the chain."
The two other friends are looking in amazement and awe as JJ gyrated her body and smiled wickedly. "Man, my cuz, had about three bottles at the table and we wuz screaming and shouting. Men wuz dancing around. Gurl, it was off da'chain."
(Amazingly for me I'm not paraphrasing although I'm omitting some of the details because they begin with the f-word and s-word.)
"You still seeing that old man?" the 16 asked.
"Shut up!" JJ said.
The 15 year old giggled. "What old man?"
16 year old said, "Some old dude comes up to us at the store and JJ gives him her number."
"He was ONLY 30." JJ said defensively. "Shut up! I'm 19 and I can see whoever I wanna see." SHE WAS BRAGGING.
"But gurl!" the 15 year old said. "You barely in the eleventh grade."
"Shut up."
The 15 year old cackles (while applying her fifth coat of lip gloss on her lips). "Was that the day you got that liquor?"
"Yeah! He cashed us out and bought us some liquor if I bought his some stuff on my bridge card," JJ confirmed.
At this point I'm appalled and fascinated... so is my ten year old as well.
"So what happened with the dude?" the 16 yr old asked.
JJ smiled wickedly again. "Gurl, he got it on..."
Needless to say, JJ started to get graphic at that point and when she started talking in detail about what she started doing to the "dude," I cleared my throat - very loudly, but JJ continued to talk, so I said, "Excuse me, but you do know everyone including my ten year old daughter can hear your conversation."
JJ actually looked offended I had the audacity to interrupt her.
"Yeah," the male bus driver said disgusted. "I hear that and you say another word I'm going to kick you off."
The 16 and 15 year old giggled, while JJ sulked the rest of the trip.
So I repeat the subject line:
You ARE 19 in the 11th grade. What's so great about bragging about that to younger friends
1) Obviously friends your age most likely don't want to put up with your stupid butt.
2) You think it's okay to talk about your personal life in public is fine
3) You're a grown woman! In 11th Grade. Take your GED already!
4) You're pathetic.
I wanted to say this all to her and when we got off the bus, knowing my daughter wanted to address the matter, I just said, "I hope I never stop loving you so you won't turn out that way. Nothing about that scenario wasn't right and somehow she made some serious wrong choices."
Now you ask, why did I put the blame on mothering?
Because ...
1) I didn't want my daughter to think no matter what she does she might still turn out that way.
2) I wanted her to appreciate the fact she had a good mother and she wasn't going to turn out that way.
I'm proud the ten year old saw what was wrong with this woman.
I got off the bus feeling really disgusted and disgruntled, but hope for the future that I can make better women in this world.
Posts
Uncovers the phenomenon of women who love emotionally unavailable men. 
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